Tuesday, June 4, 2013

What is the Script You’re Following?

Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.
Maria Robinson on letting go of the past and moving forward

In Find Your Courage, Margie Warrell writes, “Often we are bound by assumptions that we are not even aware are assumptions. Instead of our consciously choosing to live according to our stories, our stories have chosen the way we live!” She goes on to say, “Challenging your life script means challenging the way you have been observing the world. Because your stories have in some part defined who you see yourself to be, this also means being prepared to challenge the way you have viewed yourself and the identity your stories have created for you.”

Just as a director follows a script to make a film, so do we often direct our lives according to scripts influenced by the fears, doubts, and limitations of other people. In our formative years, individuals who had some authority in our life, expressed to us what they believe that who we were capable of being, what we were capable of doing and how they believed we should live our life. As children, we did not have the cognitive ability to process most of the information that we were being told to determine if in fact it was based on sound principles or someone else’s projection of life based on their personal experience.

What Stories Are Stifling You?

So many of us accepted what is said to us as children, and just like actors in a film, we have allowed these life scripts determine the roles and possibilities in our lives. As I grew older, I begin to realize that many of the scripts that were influencing my life were not in my best interest, nor serving my highest good. I found that they were simply the opinions of others and that I had the power to determine if someone else’s opinion mattered more to me than my own regarding my life. I began to question the stories that others had told me, such as:

Ø “If it ain’t one thing it’s another, It’s hard to save money and pay your bills.”
Ø “Once you have kids, your life is put on hold.”
Ø “It’s impossible for you to change careers now. You’re in your forties, it’s just too late.”
Ø “What makes you think that you can do that at your age?”
Ø “Never trust people completely, because that’s when they will take advantage of you.”
Ø “You can’t expect to raise kids’ right and have a career.”
Ø “It’s impossible to live without some debt.”
Ø “It’s difficult to start a relationship when you’re in your forties and fifties.”

Dr. Phil McGraw says, “Fixed beliefs define the roles we play in life and have a lot to do with the scripts that are running them. Whatever your fixed beliefs are: you have practiced your script for so long that you believe what it says about you and your potential.”

One of our primary goals in life should be that of self –awareness. Marcel Proust said, “The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes.” In our discovery of what makes us feel strong, courageous, and confident, we should use this knowledge to define who we are capable of being, what we are able to do, and what we are capable of experiencing in life.

Grow Forward & Flourish Assignment

This week’s assignment: Begin to identify stories that are stifling you in some aspect of your life. Challenge fixed beliefs that are based solely on opinions and assumptions versus facts and intuition. Challenge the stories that you tell yourself with this question, “Is this story moving my life forward or is it holding me back from moving my life forward?”

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Thank you for reading, connecting and contributing. I appreciate you.

Grow Forward & Flourish

Jackie B