Monday, June 24, 2013

7 Days and 7 Questions: Getting to The Truth of How You Feel


Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes. 


The primary purpose of the exercise in this article is to develop self-awareness. Developing your self-awareness increases your capacity to build your self-respect, personal integrity and courage. These personal traits are necessary for living a life that is harmoniously aligned with the truth of who you are and the life you want to experience.

For the next 7 days, instead of resisting the truth of how you feel about every aspect of your life, embrace your truth by providing your feelings with a sacred space in which you can "feel" them without any hangups about them. This could be at the end of your day, when everyone's asleep, on your lunch break or the upcoming weekend when you know that you will have some time alone to really allow yourself to "feel" what you feel about your life.



Starting Point:

Using a notebook or journal, write down each aspect of your life, ie family, finances, work/career, spiritual growth, social/friends connections etc. and ask yourself, "What is it that I truthfully feel about this aspect of my life?"


Ignore your internal filters of "what you should feel and what you shouldn't feel". For the purpose of this article, I just want you to begin to respect the truth of how you feel.


Remember, there is no right or wrong way as to how you should feel about any aspect of your life. The way that you feel is your truth. No one has the right to expect for you to deny what you feel. Nobody. Each person that you are in contact with has a right to be respected. So they have a right to not tolerate you expressing your feelings in a disrespectful manner towards them.

It is only when you are willing to embrace the "truth" about your emotions can you begin to "re-frame your perspective" on your "truth" in a way that inspires and empowers you to take meaningful action toward manifesting positive change in your life. 


The practice of writing down your thoughts and feelings is therapeutic. It helps you gain clarity and taps into the courage within your soul to take actions that are in align with your values and highest good.



It is important to note, that our feelings can be fickle at times. One day we're feeling great, on top of the world and the next day, we're singing the blues. Maybe your emotions aren't as extreme as this, but I'm sure you've recognize this human tendency. 



"Yeah, it's not just you, it happens to all of us." Which is why I am only encouraging you to acknowledge the truth of what you feel right now. Mastering your mental, emotional, spiritual and physical states is a process that occurs overtime, not in an instant!



As you acknowledge the truth of what you feel in each aspect of your life, pay attention to how they change from moment to moment, and day to day.  Throughout the upcoming week when you notice these emotional shifts, pay attention to what is happening at the moment and the thoughts that are triggering these emotional shifts. Record these emotional fluctuations and the self talk that you were having at the time about the event that triggered them in your notebook or journal.


Our emotions tend to follow our mental state at any given time.




If you are not satisfied with the state of your well-being in any area of your life, the following questions will help you gain the self-awareness and clarity necessary to take the next steps to rectify and improve your state.


Challenge the logic behind your thoughts, assumptions and beliefs by getting to the root of the story that you are telling yourself about each particular aspect of your life.  


Your answers to the following questions provide clues to the story that you are telling yourself about any area of your life. Identifying the automatic and habitual manner in which you explain experiences in your life have a tremendous impact on your ability to re-write life scripts that are no longer serving your best interest.

Challenge your assumptions with the following 7 questions for the next 7 days:

  •  "Is the story that I am telling myself in this aspect of my life based on facts, or is it outdated and based on incorrect assumptions?" 
  • "What is it that I fear will happen as a result of acknowledging my truth in this area of my life?"
  • "What evidence proves that my fear will actually happen as I believe?"
  • "What evidence is there that proves that it is unlikely that what I fear will happen as I assume?"
  • "How has my personal standards of what I will accept and tolerate in my life fuel my happiness and unhappiness in this aspect of my life?"
  • "What actions can I begin to take right now that will build my competence and confidence in any area of my life in which my fear, sense of uncertainty and self-doubt is robbing me of my capacity to create more of what I really want?"
  • "Who can I call on that supports me enough that they refuse to let me fail, and will hold me accountable for taking actions necessary to manifest my desired change?

For the next 7 days, review these questions and your answers. Get to the bone of your truth by peeling back the "should's" and just accept the truth about what you feel "as it is".

At the end of this 7 days and 7 questions exercise you should have a  greater sense of clarity about the "truth" of how you feel, the fear that is holding you captive from living your best life, and who you can reach out to in order to ensure that whatever "next" steps that you decide to take they will cheer you on while holding you accountable for taking action.

Suppressing the truth of how you feel does not change how you feel. Expressing the truth of how you feel in unhealthy and inappropriate ways only tends to add to your stress in life. Who needs that?

Acknowledging the "truth" of how you feel in a healthy and appropriate manner demonstrates self-respect, personal integrity and the courage that already exists within you. These traits are essential to creating and sustaining positive change in your life.

If you like this article, share the love by sharing it with your social networks.

Thank you for reading, connecting and sharing.

B Fearless

Jackie B

Disclaimer: I am not a mental health professional. This article is intended for self-help purposes only. My intention with this article and all others on this site is to help you "see" that you already have what it takes to move from a state of wanting change to making real progress. 

If you find that the "truth" of what you feel overwhelms you, leaves you feeling confused and bewildered, please by all means contact a local mental health professional. Help is available so that you can sort out your feelings and make sense of them in order that you live a happy and productive life.






References: Wisegeek.com (n.d). What is Explanatory Style? Retrieved from www.wisegeek.com/what-is-an-explanatory-style.htm#did-you-knowout. Author: Donn Saylor. Edited by: John Allen.